A Way to Get Unstuck That Actually Works
Hey, you. I see you out there goal-getting with your big ideas and plans and to-do lists and outlines and maybe a a notes app filled with hundreds of buzzing thoughts and captured ideas.
You’ve got big dreams, ok. You’ve got plans. You’ve got lots of ideas swirling around in that mind of yours, it’s like a jar with a bunch of happy lil fireflies in it. But if that lid never comes off, they’re not able to fly away and be free. So you may be wondering “Why do I feel stuck right now?”
Well, it may be that it’s time to level up and pop off that lid to your success by going over one of the biggest ways to get unstuck, pushing past your comfort zone.
Yeah, Yeah I Know…
This is not a new concept, no no no. It is a well known fact that “life begins past your comfort zone.” I see the inspirational quotes on Pinterest all the time. It’s one thing to go “aha,” and admire the quote and save it to your phone or something, but it’s another thing entirely to actually do it and put that into action.
I admit, I am a serial pinner. The amount of pins with inspirational or affirmative quotes that I have on my Pinterest boards is to hoarder level.
But I realized at some point that these quotes and affirmations were only going to help if I put them to use. Which meant to stop pinning and starting doing. When I tiptoed toward that direction, I eventually came to a huge brick wall with a big sign that said “COMFORT ZONE.”
Welp, looks like that’s it. The end. Big brick wall. I guess I’m done, here.
But Surpassing Comfort Zones Only Feels Impossible…
There is no actual brick wall there. It only feels like there is. And until we have a big enough reason to just go right up to the brick wall and say, “What’s good?” we’ll skirt around it, ignore it, and avoid it forever and ever and ever.
Are You Willing To Face the Things You’re Avoiding?
I was always in that camp of like, “Yes, yes! Let’s do it! Carpe diem!” But there were certain things that I was always avoiding. For instance, I was willing to go ziplining or skydiving, but I was avoiding being out there and visible on social media, or on video (gasp.)
I was willing to work on personal development and self-esteem and teach others how to do the same, but unwilling to be on video doing it, or to share it with anyone who didn’t explicitly ask.
I was willing to take the leap to be an entrepreneur, but not willing to sell to people. Or to charge what I was worth. (Which is kind of a problem…)
So when we think of what our comfort zone is, a lot of times we equate that to big things, like, taking chances, going for another job, trying something new, going skydiving, or going on a trip. We don’t often think of it as something simple, like tackling that one small task we are constantly avoiding, because hello! We’re avoiding it for a reason, right?! It makes us feel bad! Or fearful! Or ugly! Or sad! Or anxious! And who wants that?
Slip Into that Discomfort and Don’t Back Down
I absolutely love this analogy I heard once from Melody Fletcher, who is the most kick-ass law of attraction teacher ever, in regards to approaching discomfort. The analogy is that approaching things that make us feel an amount of discomfort is a lot like slipping into a hot bath. It’s hot at first, so kind of uncomfortable. But if we stick with it and stay in, we acclimate to it and suddenly the jets are whirring, the steam is magnificent, and it becomes a spa treatment.
With a lot of things past our comfort zone that make us feel uncomfortable, We don’t trust that they’ll ever lead to anything good. Our emotions have put up blockades to try and keep us safe. They’ve put up sirens that go off at full blast if we ever get close to them. So trusting that eventually those sirens will stop and it will lead to something good if you stick with it comes down to a degree of trust as well as paying attention to our patterns and fears.
Trust Your Avoidance Patterns
Make a list on paper of all of the things you’ve been avoiding. Whether this has to do with your work, success, creativity, family, anything. This could even be with just doing your laundry!! Whatever it is, write it down.
AIGHT. Now look at that list. Now next to each thing, write down WHY you’re avoiding that thing (because you have a valid reason), and also what BENEFIT it will bring to you if you just go ahead and do it (which is also a valid thing).
Now, a couple questions:
Does the benefit outweigh the reason for avoidance?
Does the benefit feel really good when you think about it?
Does the benefit benefit you more than the avoidance benefits you?!?!
IF SO THEN YOU SHOULD PROBABLY GO DO THAT THING!!!
Getting the Logical Mind On Board
Paying attention to the fact that what you’re avoiding can actually benefit you in huge ways is a major key to firing up your motivation and trusting that pushing past that fear is actually going to work out in your favor. This is the key to being like, “I see you!” to that comfort zone wall, and watching it dissolve before your eyes, because now you know what’s on the other side. If you have been continually getting pings to do something over and over and over again, chances are high it’s actually a doorway to what you want. However in your avoidance, or fear, you may be squashing it down with thoughts such as:
“It’s just not the right timing.”
“Today doesn’t feel like the right time.”
“I’ll wait until next week.”
“I can just do this when my mood is better.”
“This is too hard.”
”The stars haven’t aligned yet.”
”I’m not desperate enough yet.” (LOL, totally me.)
All of this translates into: my fear is greater than my desire.
And that’s okay, it’s totally okay to recognize that’s where you are. I’m there too sometimes! But bringing in a solid awareness is key to more easily surpassing it, tackling those fears, understanding what it is, realizing what’s going on with your emotions, and also not taking it out on yourself or thinking that you’re just “lazy” or “unmotivated.” This is how you can get unstuck and let those fireflies out of the jar.
So, pinning quotes all day and night about surpassing your comfort zone is great and all, but I think we can all agree that actually doing it is soooo much better.
Share Your Success Stories!
Do you have a personal experience or stories about surpassing your comfort zone?! What happened? How did you feel before and after? Would love to hear about your you experience, because facing fears is something we can all relate to, and could all use encouragement on now and then. Dish all the deets in the comments below! <3